Deconstruction and Finding New Life: A Journey of Exvangelicals

Are you an exvangelical questioning your religious beliefs? You're not alone. The term "exvangelical" has gained popularity among those who have left the Evangelical Church in America and are seeking a new path in Christianity. Many well-known authors, such as Rachel Held Evans, Richard Rohr, and Rob Bell, have given a voice to those undergoing this journey.

In the mid-2000s, I too began my deconstruction journey. It can be a lonely and isolating experience, as opening up about your doubts can sometimes be met with danger. Fortunately, I had the support of my pastor and community during this challenging time. Through reading numerous books and introspection, I was able to gain a better understanding of my feelings and beliefs.

This experience led me to become a spiritual director today. I'm not saying I've arrived at a final destination, but I am a few steps ahead and can offer guidance to others walking their own path toward new life. I've come to believe that Jesus' message of being "born again" is what he was referring to during his conversation with Nicodemus. My life and faith have undergone radical transformations since my deconstruction journey began.

In walking alongside someone who I consider to be reconstructing, a number of different topics come up. As we work together I am sure we will stumble into several of these:

Understanding deconstructi0n as grief and what to do with the feelings of loss
Giving yourself time to heal
Meeting God in new ways - even outside of church
Moving toward uncertainty - learning to hold hard things
Reconstructing prayer, the Bible and other closely held beliefs
Rooting faith in long-held beliefs and giving creedance to our own experience
How deconstruction reshapes nearly all your relationships in both good and hard ways (especially with family)

This may be difficult for you to hear (and sometimes I can’t believe I can say this) but I believe that God is drawing you to a new place of faith. That journey is going to include a lot of tears, anger, changing relationships and a number of other experiences but you are going to go somewhere better than where you came from. As a spiritual director, I don’t have an agenda for where you need to go. I welcome all of your questions and want to go exploring with you. I’d be honored if you would at least give me one session to talk it through with you.

I encourage you to check out a few more articles and then send me an email here. Your first session is completely free. I will answer any questions you have about spiritual direction and then we will do a 20-30 minute session so you get a feel for how it works.

This podcast conversation may be one that is helpful to you: