What Questions Should I Ask A Spiritual Director?

The beginning of a relationship with a new spiritual director is often not as simple as setting an appointment and it is a match. Spiritual Directors bring their own backgrounds, personalities and training to every working relationship. It is a good idea to find a friend to refer you to a spiritual director but maybe you are just seeking a director and need to know questions to ask to find out if you and this new director are a good match. 

The goal is to find a good match or a good fit for you. This may take some trial and error and meeting with a few directors. It is a good idea for you to begin by doing some initial consultation with yourself. You should have a couple of ideas in mind before you begin your search. You may want to ask yourself these following questions: 

  • Will I be more comfortable with a male or female director?

  • Do I want someone who comes from a similar faith background?

  • How much am I willing to pay for this?

  • What times of the day is best for me?

  • Do I want to meet with someone in person or could a Zoom meeting work?

Once you have answered these questions for yourself, this will help you narrow your search. For instance, you may now only be seeking out female directors who have similar faith backgrounds to you and can meet in person. So now you can begin to reach out to potential directors but how will you know what to ask them?

Here are some additional questions to ask to help you discover if you may have found a match:

  • What Spiritual Direction training, education or certifications do you hold?

  • What are your own personal spiritual practices?

  • Do you have a typical client or an area of direction you specialize in?

  • When are you able to meet and how often do you like to meet with a new directee?

  • Do you have an agreement you sign with new directees to guide the relationship?

It is your task to determine whether or not a spiritual director is a match for you. These questions should help you on your search. 

Read Next: Seven Big Questions About Spiritual Direction